When I was ten, I invited my neighbour, Fiona, to my place to celebrate her birthday. We were very close friends as we were of the same age. A few days before the birthday celebration, my sister and I had prepared a few birthday presents for her by folding a few origami art pieces. Some of these included a miniature T-shirt and trousers. My sister intended to give Fiona the presents after the entire birthday celebration to surprise her, but I was eager and presented the origami pieces to Fiona right after cutting the cake. She was really happy when she received them, until she saw the miniature T-shirt and trousers. Suddenly she stopped smiling and gave a very disgusted look. She even put down all the origami presents, saying she wanted to leave. My sister and I were shocked for her sudden change in attitude, but we were too bewildered and afraid to ask her what was wrong. Just before Fiona stepped out of our house, I tried persuading her again to accept the origami presents as my sister and I had put in a lot of effort folding them. However, she was adamant about rejecting them and left hurriedly.
My sister was angry and I was feeling hurt, so I told my mother what happened when she returned home at night. My mother was taken aback and explained to us the reason for Fiona’s strong reaction. It was because Fiona came from a Taoist family, and they practise burning of paper clothes, believing it is a way to bring clothes from the mortal world to the deceased in the netherworld. I was finally enlightened as to why Fiona was upset; it was inauspicious for her to receive paper clothes, and worse still, on her birthday. My sister and I were not aware as we come from a Christian family.
Thinking back, maybe as children we could not express ourselves clearly and were not as sensitive, resulting in the communication breakdown between Fiona and me. She could have told me what went wrong, and on my part, I should have stopped insisting she keep the paper presents. Since then, I have become more sensitive in observing practices from other religions and cultures so that I would not offend my friends unintentionally.
Hi Wanqi!
ReplyDeleteI guess sometimes we have to go through things the hard way. But its good that you learnt an important lesson from this incident!
Truthfully, I didn't think much about the origami clothing. But now that you've highlighted it, I will bear it in mind when I interact with my taoist friends from now on. Thanks for letting me be aware of it!
Hi Wanqi,
ReplyDeleteI think it should be ok since you are still ten by the time it happened, adults who are considerable will understand that kids may not know these taboo. From your neighbor expression, I thing the origami shirt you made is very similar to those paper clothes.
For some very traditional Taoist family, it can be considered as very unfortunate to receive an origami shirt and trousers, especially during some important festival. However, in today’s modern world, we will always do some handwork art piece as a gift to someone we care on their birthday or some important moment. Most people are more open minded today and will not mind about those taboo so much as they will in the past ten years.
It is alright to make a mistake, but what’s more important is that we should learn from the mistake made and avoid it to happen for the second time.
Hey Wanqi,
ReplyDeleteThat incident must have left quite an impression on you for you to remember it even now. I agree with Jingyuan that we become more open-minded as we grow older and especially in today's society, so it's less of an issue this days.
You and your sister seem so cute! :)